September often feels like an invitation to begin again. School resumes, fall approaches, the weather begins to change, and the days grow shorter. The rhythms of summer give way to fuller calendars, new routines, and a renewed focus on what we hope to accomplish before the year ends.
Summer always seems to begin slowly and stretch out before me. Then August arrives, and I am shocked that it is nearly over, ha! That cadence leaves me wanting to catch my breath, slow down, and savor what remains. This September, the sunsets have felt like a divine reminder to notice beauty and remember that endings can be beautiful, too.
As cooler weather arrives, I find myself reflecting on the nine months that have already passed and considering how I want to spend the three that remain. Before rushing to fill them, perhaps this is a moment to pause and ask a deeper question:
What do I want these months, this year, and this life to mean?
Meaning is often described as something we must find, as though it were hidden somewhere outside us, waiting to be uncovered. But meaning is also something we make. It is shaped by the lens through which we see the world, by what we notice, how we interpret our experiences, whom we love and spend our time with, what we contribute, and the choices we make each day.
The meaning we create and the emotions we attach to our experiences shape our lens. Our lens influences our actions. Our actions, in turn, reinforce the meaning we make.
I have shared before the idea that we are both the writers and narrators of our life stories. Sometimes the story we have told about our past does not empower the future we long to create. When that happens, we can revisit the story. We can even fire the narrator!
We can tell the truth about what happened while choosing a perspective that is honest, authentic, and in service of who we are becoming. Each year is another paragraph in the novel of our lives. I find it valuable to meet with the writer and narrator from time to time, to look back at the threads and themes developing in my story and consider what I want to carry into the next paragraph or chapter. September has become one of those moments for me, a time to notice the meaning I have been making and decide what meaning I want to take forward. I get to edit, and I take the opportunity to do so.
As I have shared previously, the emotional intelligence course I took in 2014, and again in 2015, helped me recognize how my story shifted when my lens changed. The courses helped me to see I had a unique lens through which I was seeing, and that I could upgrade the lens as needed.
Our individual lenses are shaped by our experiences and by the emotions we attached to those experiences at the time. Our brains catalogue this information and draw on it regularly. These records create shortcuts that help the brain conserve energy. We encounter a new situation, and our brain goes to the library, retrieves data from the past, applies it to the present, and decides it already “knows” how things will unfold.
These shortcuts contribute to our assumptions, biases, and blind spots. They are useful, but the information they retrieve is not always accurate, current, or capable of producing the outcome we want. If we want a different outcome, we may need to pause and examine the references our brain is pulling from the shelves. We can re-catalogue the library. With time, distance, and reflection, the meaning of important experiences can change, as can the way we understand ourselves because of them.
Each time I moved as a child, I went into survival mode. I hid in the school library, and by the time I emerged and began to find my feet and my people, we moved again. I was a sad and lonely kid, and that story could have continued to define me as a sad and lonely adult. But I had a choice, and I chose to experiment with what I put in and the outcome and impact that resulted.
The experience of having a stroke nine years ago, for instance, was a time I tried something new – I chose to sit in the discomfort of its aftermath and that pause helped me see my story differently. I realized that all those moves had made me adaptable. They taught me how to reinvent myself, make the best of wherever I lived, and create friendships and a meaningful life wherever I landed. I also began to see how the challenges in my past had built the resilience, endurance, courage, and grit I needed to face the fear of running and swimming again after the stroke. Those experiences helped me return to running and complete the Boston Marathon just six weeks later. Through the lens of my life experiences, that did not feel nuts!
The stroke put many things into perspective. Since then, I have tried to be more present and attentive to the beauty held within ordinary moments. I seek and create more opportunities to pause and experience awe in the moments I once might have allowed to pass unnoticed. I spend more intentional time with the people I value and love. I take time to say ‘yes’ to opportunities for connection, fun, and awe, and I see beauty and joy in the small things – camping in the yard, making a butterfly out of pizza, sharing ice cream by the water in this gorgeous place we are privileged to call home, summertime bowling, and even car-wash adventures.
I want to celebrate the ordinary and recognize the extraordinary within everyday life.
Meaning is made in moments, and I collect them.
We get to participate in creating our stories. Through consistent reflection, I have strengthened my ability to reframe and rewrite my story in service of the future I want to create. I have also strengthened my capacity for wonder – the ability to pause, pay attention, and see the beauty in what might otherwise appear mundane.
As we continue exploring this year’s theme of CREATE, here are three thoughts about creating meaning, and creating a life that feels meaningful.
Thought One: Meaning Is Particular
We can become overwhelmed by the question, “What is the meaning of my life?”
The question can make it sound as though there should be one definitive answer, a single purpose, calling, or contribution that explains everything.
Viktor Frankl offers a more compassionate possibility: meaning is PARTICULAR. It changes with the moment and asks something different of us during different seasons of our lives.
I have recently been revisiting James Clear’s Atomic Habits. Clear writes:
“Progress requires unlearning. Becoming the best version of yourself requires you to continuously edit your beliefs, and to upgrade and expand your identity.”
—James Clear, Atomic Habits, p. 36
Today, meaning might be found in doing courageous work. Tomorrow, it might emerge through caring for someone, creating beauty, telling the truth, repairing a relationship, or simply remaining present during a difficult season.
Perhaps we do not need to understand the meaning of our entire lives today. Perhaps we only need to ask:
What is this moment asking me to create, contribute, learn, or become?
What has felt especially meaningful during this season of my life?
What am I being invited to learn—or unlearn—right now?
What part of my identity is evolving?
Thought Two: Meaning ≠ Happiness
A meaningful life may not be something we successfully complete. It may be something we continually create through the relationship between our values and our choices.
A meaningful life does not require every experience to be pleasant or every chapter to unfold as planned. Meaning asks us to engage with the whole of life: love, beauty, work, calling, suffering, relationships, reflection, and questions that may never have simple answers.
This distinction may be especially important for high achievers. Achievement can provide satisfaction, but accomplishment alone cannot tell us why our lives matter.
Consider:
When have I experienced something difficult that ultimately became meaningful?
What experience did I not choose but now understand differently?
Where has the pursuit of achievement, approval, or productivity pulled me away from what matters?
Thought Three: Creating Meaning
We may not control everything that happens to us. We do, however, have some choice in what we make of what happens. We create meaning when we connect an experience to a larger story. We create meaning when we choose purpose over performance. We create meaning when we allow suffering to deepen rather than define us. We create meaning when we use our gifts in service of someone or something beyond ourselves.
We also create meaning through the attention, intention, and humanity we bring to ordinary moments.
As September unfolds, perhaps the invitation is not to determine the meaning of your entire life. Instead, consider:
What meaning have I assigned to an experience, and is that interpretation still serving me?
Is there another story that is equally true and more useful?
What do I want to contribute—not simply accomplish—before this year ends?
What am I creating that may outlast the moment in which I create it?
What meaning am I creating through the way I am living today?
Three I’s of EQ™ Reflection:
Inward — When and where does my life feel most meaningful? What has been quietly asking for more of my attention?
Integrate — How closely do my current choices reflect what I believe matters? What choice would bring my inner sense of meaning and my outward life into greater alignment?
Impact — What meaningful contribution, conversation, or experience do I want to create this month? What am I creating through the way I show up for others?
Ignite — What is one small action I can take this week to create more meaning?
Meaning is not only something we discover. Meaning is something we participate in creating.
Quote I’m Pondering:
“What matters, therefore, is not the meaning of life in general but rather the specific meaning of a person’s life at a given moment.”
~ Viktor E. Frankl, Man’s Search for Meaning ~
Book I’m Reading:
The Meaning of Your Life
By Arthur C. Brooks
What Amazon Has to Say:
#1 NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER
From the bestselling author of From Strength to Strength, the definitive account of how the modern world makes meaning so hard to find—and a plan to discover your life’s deepest purpose.
If you struggle to discern life’s meaning, you’re not alone. Millions today describe a growing sense of emptiness, a lack of purpose and significance. And there’s a reason: Rapid cultural, economic, and technological changes have rewired our brains, reducing their ability to perceive depth and purpose.
In The Meaning of Your Life, social scientist and happiness expert Arthur C. Brooks shows you how to push back against these changes and find the meaning you need to live a happy, fulfilling life. Relying on cutting-edge science, he offers practical, evidence-based strategies for breaking free of the powerful trends and personal habits that dull your focus on the why of your life. Drawing on the great philosophers and the world’s faith traditions, he shows how everyone can—and must—approach life’s most important and mysterious questions and provides a blueprint that will help even the most skeptical person find a life of spiritual transcendence, passionate love, and true calling.
“What is the meaning of my life?” is not an unanswerable question, but rather the start of a pilgrimage into unexplored corners of your consciousness. The Meaning of Your Life is your handbook for this journey
My Thoughts and Takeaways:
In his new book, The Meaning of Your Life: Finding Purpose in an Age of Emptiness, Arthur C. Brooks examines why so many people struggle to experience meaning, even when their lives appear successful from the outside. Brooks suggests that meaning includes three essential experiences:
- Coherence: My life and experiences make sense as part of a larger story.
- Purpose: My life has direction, and I have something worth moving toward.
- Significance: My existence matters, and my life has value beyond achievement or status.
Meaning, then, is not synonymous with happiness. I appreciated how Brooks connected coherence, a concept I am most familiar with from Designing Your Life by Bill Burnett and Dave Evans, along with purpose and significance, creating, for me, a new and more nuanced way of thinking of meaning.
We are often skilled at asking:
- What needs to be done?
- How can I improve?
- What should I accomplish next?
- How can I solve this problem?
He offers the idea that “Meaning requires knowledge of our life’s why. But we spend almost all of our energy on the what and how instead” (89). Brooks invites us to make space for different questions:
- Why am I doing what I am doing?
- What makes this worth doing?
- What gives my life coherence?
- Who benefits from the way I am living?
- What am I creating through the way I spend my days?
“The willingness and capacity to wonder and inquire about things large and small that are the essence of our uniquely human consciousness.” This is what Socrates meant when he offered “The unexamined life is not worth living.” And as Brooks puts it, “a life that is not deeply questioned is bereft of meaning” (84).
Podcast I’ve Listened To:
Arthur Brooks on the Crisis of Meaning & How to Actually Find It
The Rich Roll Podcast | Episode #977 | March 30, 2026
Arthur Brooks is a Harvard Professor, best-selling author, and one of the world’s leading authorities on human happiness.
This conversation explores what he calls a psychogenic epidemic – a crisis of meaning driven by the very technology we can’t put down. We discuss the three macronutrients of happiness, why our brains have been rewired to miss what matters most, the striver’s curse, and an ancient escape plan for modern life.
Things get personal when he diagnoses my happiness on a scale of one to ten. The results are humbling.
I love this man. Take notes for this one. Enjoy!
My Thoughts and Takeaways:
In the episode, Brooks explores why achievement, optimization, productivity, and even wellness can leave us feeling empty when they are disconnected from deeper meaning.
The conversation challenges us to move beyond asking how to make life more efficient and begin asking what makes life worth living. My favorite part was when they started discussing the aspects of meaning vs. happiness and offered these equations:
Meaning = Coherence + Purpose + Significance
Happiness = Enjoyment + Satisfaction + Meaning
Listen to the Rich Roll Podcast conversation
As you listen, consider:
- Where have I confused achievement with meaning?
- Which parts of my life feel coherent and connected?
- Where am I moving efficiently without knowing why?
- What experiences remind me that my life matters?
- What relationships, practices, or contributions create meaning for me?
- What might I create if meaning—not expectation—became my compass?
~
You can sign up to receive my Three Thoughts for Thursday post as an email on the third Thursday of every month by clicking here. If you’ve missed any of my Three Thoughts, you can find them all on my blog. If you enjoyed this post, take a look at my recap of 2025 in December’s Three Thoughts and last month’s August Three Thoughts for Thursday. You may also be interested in reading some of my other recent blog posts, like the four-part Lessons of the Run series –Endurance, Resilience, Rest, and Grit. Take a look at my latest post, The Gift of the Fog, and “YOU are the MISSING Piece!”
If you are interested or know someone who may be interested, I also offer leadership and emotional intelligence coaching and workshops. You can find more information on my website, or you can use this link to set up a free 30-minute introduction to coaching session.
I have partnered with my fellow Education and Coaching colleague, Dr. Joan Flora, to offer a new experience we are calling The Empathy & Attunement Studio. This new endeavor seeks to create space to take emotions and experiences to the “studio” to build and practice new tools and create new outcomes in emotionally charged conversations and relationships. This space explores emotions and their purpose, the information they hold about our human needs, and how we can learn to respond with intention and integrity instead of reacting and regretting. We are offering monthly Open Houses and Studio Practice Space where you can learn more and dive into creating new outcomes.
Come check out what we’re up to at The Empathy & Attunement Studio ~ Where Emotional Awareness Becomes Purposeful Action!
I also have the privilege of hosting the Emotional Intelligence Special Interest Group for ICFLA. Please consider joining us for the remaining sessions of the ICFLA EI SIG in 2026! We began the 2026 series on February 24th with Re-grounding Coaching in Emotional Intelligence: Foundations That Deepen Presence, Insight, and Impact. In April, Elena Sarango-Muniz joined us to share on the topic of The Art of Approachability – Build Bridges, Create Connections, Unlock Possibilities. On June 23rd Erika Parker Price joined us and presented on the topic of What AI Can’t Do: The Case for Human Skills. On August 25th, we had the privilege of having Joshua Freedman, CEO and Co-Founder of 6 Secondswho presented on “What AI Can’t Replace: The Business Case for EQ and the Coach’s Role in Building It” in a multi-chapter event with ICF WA and ICF Oregon. And to close the year, we will have Shruti Rustagi, PCC Coach at Compounding Leadership, and Finance and Strategy Leader at Amazon, who will present on EQ at Work: From Individual Insight to Organizational Impact. Register here!
Want to know more about the ICFLA Emotional Intelligence Special Interest Group and what we’ve covered lately? We kicked off our 2025 explorations and learning journey on February 25th with guest Dr. J.D. Pincus of AgileBrain, who walked us through The LA Wildfires through the Lens of Emotional Needs: Coaching in Times of Loss. On Tuesday, June 24th, we both revisited and explored emotional intelligence in coaching through our topic, Emotional Intelligence Foundations for Coaching and Workplace Impact, with guest Maribel Hines, MBA, SPHR, CPLP. Maribel offered her insights, wisdom, and perspective through her in-house leadership and coaching and EQ practitioner lens. It was a great session as we translated theory and emotional intelligence into action and impact! Our August 26th session with Dr. Joan Flora focused on From Reactivity to Resilience: Coaching to Soften Reactivity and Strengthen Resilience. Our final session for the year was on Tuesday, October 28th, with guest speaker, Nicole Venner, who created space to explore, discuss, and practice ways of holding space for Emotional Intelligence in Threshold Spaces.
If you are interested in joining and co-creating these learning communities, please use the links above to learn more about The Empathy & Attunement Studio, ICFLA’s Emotional Intelligence Special Interest Group, and BrainByDesign, and for more information about Women’s Events, please email me to learn more! I hope you will come along for the journey!
I’m always looking for new inspiration, new books to read, and new podcasts to listen to, so please send your suggestions my way or comment on this post to offer some new recommendations!
Wishing you a season of looking inward with curiosity to notice the stories, experiences, and meanings shaping the lens through which you see your life; integrating intention into choices that reflect what matters most; and creating impact through the meaning, beauty, connection, and possibility you bring to ordinary moments and the lives of others.
May you slow down long enough to meet the writer and narrator of your story, hold your past with honesty and compassion, and recognize where an old interpretation may no longer serve the future you want to create. May September’s sunsets remind you that endings can be beautiful, that meaning can change with time and perspective, and that you have the power to shape what comes next.
Be a meaning maker. Notice the story. Name the meaning. Reframe the lens. Write the next chapter. Enjoy living it!
And may you remember: a meaningful life isn’t only something we find, it is something we notice, interpret, nurture, and intentionally create.
Thank you for being a part of my journey, and for your continued support and readership! Stay strong, stay brave, stay true to you!
Desiree Briel Rodi Consulting & Coaching 