Desiree has worked in Higher Education Administration at Princeton University School of Architecture, non-profits in the Seattle-area, and in People and Business Strategy at Brooks Sports and uniquelyHR, in addition to owning her own personal chef business, Able Table. With experience in the start-up world, in non-profits and higher education, and in large corporations and government, Desiree is passionate about leadership and development and building successful companies through simultaneous creation of people and business strategy based on the vision and mission of a company.
Desiree finds great satisfaction in helping others to become their best, while simultaneously pursuing her own path of self-improvement. Desiree holds a B.A. in Art and American Studies from Yale University and an MBA from Seattle University where she continues to assist with and facilitate graduate leadership courses, MGMT 5100, Leadership Skills and Team Development, and MGMT 5335, Leading with Emotional Intelligence.
Desiree is also a member of the Los Angeles chapter of SHRM, PIHRA, and attends the local LA chapter meetings of the International Coaching Federation.
Fall is still my very favorite season, and I have noticed I especially love October! During this season, particularly the month of October, the colors seem especially vibrant and I am constantly in awe of the changes and transformations I observe in the trees around me. I also likely don’t need to mention again, my fascination with midlife, but I will because not only am I in it but so are many of my clients. In this season of life, I am also observing and celebrating transformations.
I find the learnings and lessons of midlife profound and connected to my observations of October. This month as I have been noticing the leaves changing color, the new hues and shades amidst the green, I have been thinking about the desires for purpose and authenticity that seem to come with midlife. I have also been considering the willingness to finally take off the mask and boldly step forth in truth. The midlife and post-midlife, to me, represent a call to bare oneself with unapologetic transparency, to willingly stand out rather than submit to a need to blend in or the “shoulds” of others, and to learn you belong because of your differences, not in spite of them.
As I observe the natural cycle of seasons, I think maybe it is just nature that leads so many to wait until later in life to show up fully, much as trees change in the 9th, 10th, or even 11th month of the year. I wonder what our world could be like if we embraced our true selves and diversity and reveled in the humanity that unites us earlier in our journey through this one precious life. Perhaps change is simply a part of humanity and the real lesson is to embrace growth and change as it comes in each stage but also to support truth and authenticity throughout the journey.
What could the world be like if we saw in color instead of so often in black and white? What if we could appreciate and embrace all the different hues rather than picking favorites or passing judgments? How might you show up more authentically and fully even through periods of transition and changes? How might you, in whatever position in life you find yourself, encourage others and create an environment that supports others to show up more transparently, honestly, and fully human? What is your dream for yourself when you think about how you’d like to show up? What keeps you from showing up this way? What gives you a sense of belonging? What is your dream for our world? If you don’t have one, why not? What is one thing you might choose to work on in yourself that may begin to pave the way for a more just world, one change, one transformation at a time?
Oscar Trimboli is an author, host of the Apple award-winning podcast Deep Listening and a sought-after keynote speaker. He is passionate about using the gift of listening to bring positive change in homes, workplaces, and cultures around the world. Through his work with chairs, boards of directors, and executive teams, Oscar has experienced firsthand the transformational impact leaders and organizations can have when they listen beyond the words.
Oscar is a marketing and technology industry veteran with over 30 years of experience across general management, sales, marketing, and operations for Microsoft, PeopleSoft, Polycom, Professional Advantage, and Vodafone. He is the author of the book, Deep Listening and now, his newest book, How to Listen: Discover the Hidden Key to Better Communication*.
In this conversation, Oscar and I explore several of the assumptions that tend to get in our way of listening well. Oscar highlights distinctions that will be useful mindsets for you in showing up better in future conversations. Plus, we discuss how listing goes far beyond simply asking questions.
Key Points
Before we begin listening, it is helpful to tune…much like an orchestra.
We can’t always give our full attention, but we can make the choice as to whether we are paying attention or giving attention.
As much as we intend otherwise, sometimes we listen less well in our closest relationships.
Aim to be curious instead of drawing conclusions.
Asking questions does not necessarily mean you are listening well. Aimless and arbitrary questions are everywhere.
I so enjoyed this podcast about how even small assumptions can keep us from experiencing true connection and understanding. I especially loved that he shared the experience of his son and his wife as they navigated the meaning of half of eight/8!
I am LOVING this book! It is reminding me that I need to sit down and write my own visions for how Emotional Intelligence can help support a world of equality by allowing us to connect with our humanity, and expand our ability to be more human and our capacity for other humans. More on that to come!
What Amazon Has to Say:
“Reading this courageous book feels like the beginning of a social and personal awakening…I can’t stop thinking about it.”—Brené Brown, PhD, author of Atlas of the Heart
For readers of Emergent Strategy and Dare to Lead, an activist’s roadmap to long-term social justice impact through four simple shifts.
We need a fundamental shift in our values–a pivot in how we think, act, work, and connect. Despite what we’ve been told, the most critical mainspring of social change isn’t coalition building or problem analysis. It’s healing: deep, whole, and systemic, inside and out.
Here, Shawn Ginwright, PhD, breaks down the common myths of social movements–a set of deeply ingrained beliefs that actually hold us back from healing and achieving sustainable systemic change. He shows us why these frames don’t work, proposing instead four revolutionary pivots for better activism and collective leadership:
Awareness: from lens to mirror Connection: from transactional to transformative relationships Vision: from problem-fixing to possibility-creating Presence: from hustle to flow
Supplemented with reflections, prompts, cutting-edge research, and the author’s own insights and lived experience as an African American social scientist, professor, and movement builder, The Four Pivots helps us uncover our obstruction points. It shows us how to discover new lenses and boldly assert our need for connection, transformation, trust, wholeness, and healing. It gives us permission to create a better future–to acknowledge that a broken system has been predefining our dreams and limiting what we allow ourselves to imagine, but that it doesn’t have to be that way at all. Are you ready to pivot?
Here are a few of my notes and key takeaways/questions from Pivot 1: Awareness, Lens to Mirror
Ginwright notes that eliminating problems doesn’t create victories. This was powerful for me as it put into perspective all the time and effort we as a society, and as humans, consultants, parents, managers, etc., put into solving surface problems. He went on to note that “inequality erodes our ability to see any other way – predefined our dreams, conditions us to focus on surface-level issues. He calls for deep, personal work, over instituting new solutions to these “surface problems” in order to create real and lasting change.
He further calls out the need to go deeper, to strive to see the myths and beliefs Ginwright notes “that we are living by that must be seen in order to change them.” How might you work to go beyond getting striving to be better at your job, looking towards the next promotion, and really support this deeper work that will serve you more fully and will also serve our society and world, one person at a time?
What are you doing to support yourself and your inner work, to have a lens and a mirror? What “obstruction spots created by socialization” have you worked to clear to be a better human and create change?
Thoughts on Ginwright’s “True sight – hindsight, foresight and insight” concept, and the idea that “the hardest look is inward”?
How might you integrate his reflections on clarity – “Suspension, Saltation, and Creep”?
Topic for further ponderings – What gets in the way of clarity – Ego, Lack of Confidence, Lens of Opposition, and Resistance – how do you see these show up in your professional and personal life/communications/relationships?
You can sign up to receive my Three Thoughts for Thursday post as an email on the third Thursday of every month by clicking here.
If you are interested or know someone who may be interested, I also offer leadership and emotional intelligence coaching and workshops. You can find more information on my website, or you can use this link to set up a free 30-minute introduction to coaching session.
On September 17th, I hosted my first local, in-person event here in the Seattle area, Savor the Sweetness. It was a fulfilling experience and event, and I look forward to hosting quarterly events for local women in 2023 – stay tuned and contact me for more information or to join the invite list!
Please check out my latest blog post, The Problem of Intentions, Also check out my post, Be Careful, Recipes and Inspiration Yield Different Results! and my September Edition of Three Thoughts for Thursday, as well. In light of my continued themes on process and habits, you may also be interested in my series, Lessons of the Run – Endurance, Resilience, Rest, and Grit. And if you could stand to hear more about processes and patterns, stay tuned for an upcoming expanded post on Examining the Process – Behind the Drive.
Beginning last year, in April 2021, I have had the privilege of hosting the Emotional Intelligence Special Interest Group for ICFLA. Please join us for November’s session on Tuesday, the 29th of November for a panel discussion of EI in the Workplace.
In September, I completed a year-long, quarterly series entitled “EQ and WooWoo” with my colleague and Spiritual Coach, Katie Kay. If you are intrigued and would like to learn more about future events, please email me. This workshop series was designed to help you manifest action toward the year you want to live, the person you want to be, and the goals you want to achieve in 2022. These quarterly sessions intertwined the use of Tarot (and other Woowoo tools) and Emotional Intelligence to help you and your clients step outside the box in order to take your coaching and personal work deeper. New and related sessions will begin in 2023.
If you are interested in joining and co-creating these learning communities, please use the links above to find out more about ICFLA’s Emotional Intelligence Special Interest Group and the EQ & WooWoo Workshops. I hope you will come along for the journey!
I’m always looking for new inspiration, new books to read, and new podcasts to listen to, so please send your suggestions my way or comment on this post to offer some new recommendations!
As always, thank you for your continued support and readership! Stay strong, stay brave, stay true to you!
Wishing you a season of colorful foliage and brilliant transformation toward authenticity and true belonging!
The sunsets have been stunning, the colors bold and breathtaking. Likely, the forest fires raging in Oregon and southern Washington have a part to play in the way the light and pollution come together to create art in the sky as the day comes to a close, a reminder of how beauty can come even from endings and destruction.
As the summer comes to a close, I have been reflecting on the beauty of both the season and its end, and how the close of summer enhances my desire to embrace and enjoy every last moment. The sunsets have called me to pause and appreciate the beauty of a day’s end. These reflections around endings and destruction have also led me to again recognize how endings give way to beginnings, destruction gives way to new creation, and the importance of savoring the journey and the bittersweetness of these moments.
It is also in this transition from summer to fall that I reminisce on the butterfly migration in the Los Angeles area I was so privileged to witness while living there. While we were in LA this past April, we went to the butterfly gardens at the Natural History Museum. One of my very favorite experiences in LA was the mass migration of butterflies. They were so thick in the air everywhere; it was as if we’d been invaded. So unexpected and such a pleasant surprise, these beautiful butterflies even surrounded us on the traffic-jammed highways! I arrived in LA for what would be a 2+-year sojourn, angry to be there, and left quite transformed by the colorful experience and deep friendships I gained. Our LA experience provided a new reference and definition for me of bittersweetness. Only at the end could I see the beauty of the personal transformation I’d undergone as the sunset on our time there and the butterflies undertook their journey.
As the sun sets on this day, on this season, both literal and metaphorical, what is ending for you? What do endings mean for you, and what emotions do they trigger? What is beginning? What beauty do you see in the finale? When and where have you experienced beauty in the breaking, in the ending? As you reflect on your life experiences, where do you see moments of bittersweetness? How have they shaped you? How have you shaped and made meaning of these moments?
Sunset over Lake Washington
Quote I’m pondering:
Perhaps the butterfly is proof that you can go through a great deal of darkness and still become something beautiful.
I just finished listening to the Audible version of this book and absolutely loved it! As someone who has been accused of being Eeyore, of being overly sentimental, of feeling a deep appreciation for the character, Sadness, in InsideOut, and as someone who walked down the aisle to Moonlight Sonata, this book spoke to me on so many levels. I have come to feel great frustration with our cultural insistence/mandate to “be happy, just be happy,” ALL OF THE TIME! I believe what we so often think of as the “negative emotions” have a very important place and purpose, and at the very least, allow us to really know what it feels like when happiness comes within.
Thinking about sunsets, beauty in endings, and the breaking down involved in metamorphosis, makes me also consider my time living in Los Angeles, a time that truly allowed me to feel and experience bittersweetness. I showed up angry to be there and left changed and sad to say goodbye. The transformation was all the things – painful and inexplicably wonderful all at once, and to say goodbye was both excruciating and exciting.
I hope you will give this book a read or a listen! This book spoke to my soul. I felt a deep human connection and a new appreciation for my own life experience. I’d love to hear what you think!!
~
What Amazon has to say:
#1 NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • Sadness is your superpower. In her new masterpiece, the author of the bestselling phenomenon Quiet explores the power of the bittersweet personality, revealing a misunderstood side of mental health and creativity while offering a roadmap to facing grief in order to live life to the fullest.
“Bittersweet grabs you by the heart and doesn’t let go.”—BRENÉ BROWN, author of Atlas of the Heart
“Susan Cain has described and validated my existence once again!”—GLENNON DOYLE, author of Untamed
“The perfect cure for toxic positivity.”—ADAM GRANT, author of Think Again
ONE OF THE MOST ANTICIPATED BOOKS OF 2022—Oprah Daily, BookPage
Bittersweetness is a tendency to states of longing, poignancy, and sorrow; an acute awareness of passing time; and a curiously piercing joy at the beauty of the world. It recognizes that light and dark, birth and death—bitter and sweet—are forever paired.
If you’ve ever wondered why you like sad music . . . If you find comfort or inspiration in a rainy day . . . If you react intensely to music, art, nature, and beauty . . .
Then you probably identify with the bittersweet state of mind.
With Quiet, Susan Cain urged our society to cultivate space for the undervalued, indispensable introverts among us, thereby revealing an untapped power hidden in plain sight. Now she employs the same mix of research, storytelling, and memoir to explore why we experience sorrow and longing, and how embracing the bittersweetness at the heart of life is the true path to creativity, connection, and transcendence.
Cain shows how a bittersweet state of mind is the quiet force that helps us transcend our personal and collective pain, whether from a death or breakup, addiction or illness. If we don’t acknowledge our own heartache, she says, we can end up inflicting it on others via abuse, domination, or neglect. But if we realize that all humans know—or will know—loss and suffering, we can turn toward one another.
At a time of profound discord and personal anxiety, Bittersweet brings us together in deep and unexpected ways.
What I’m listening to:
I was so inspired by and resonated with Susan Cain’s Bittersweet that I sought out podcasts with her as a guest. I found one new podcast I want to investigate beyond the interview with her and one old favorite, The Tim Ferris Show, that I’ve found to provide consistent inspiration. Let me know what you think!!
Passion Struck is a show focused on exploring the mindset and philosophy of some of the world’s most insightful people. John R. Miles unpacks guests’ wisdom on creating an intentional purpose-driven life and turns it into practical advice that you can use to impact your work, life, and relationships.
Susan’s first record-smashing TED Talk has been viewed more than 40 million times and was named by Bill Gates as one of his all-time favorite talks (and if you like that one, you should check out her most recent TED Talk with violinist Min Kym). LinkedIn named her the top sixth influencer in the world, just behind Richard Branson and Melinda Gates. Susan partners with Malcolm Gladwell, Adam Grant, and Dan Pink to curate the Next Big Idea Club. They donate all of their proceeds to children’s literacy programs.
Bittersweet: How Sorrow and Longing Make us Whole
In her new book, Susan discusses why sadness and the happiness of melancholy are key to achieving self-transcendence and the union between souls. As with the majority of people, you’ve probably been taught your entire life to look at the positive side and be happy no matter what. While there is a place for optimism and looking at the bright side, by burying your melancholy and sadness, you may actually be doing yourself a terrible disservice.
Additional Podcasts with Tim Ferris and Susan Cain:
You can sign up to receive my Three Thoughts for Thursday post as an email on the third Thursday of every month by clicking here.
Women local to the Seattle area, you are invited to attend Savor the Sweetness on September 17th. For more information and to RSVP, please click here.
Please check out my latest blog post, The Problem of Intentions, Also check out my post, Be Careful, Recipes and Inspiration Yield Different Results! and my August Edition of Three Thoughts for Thursday, as well. In light of my continued theme on process, you may also be interested in my series, Lessons of the Run – Endurance, Resilience, Rest, and Grit. And if you could stand to hear more about processes and patterns, stay tuned for an upcoming expanded post on Examining the Process – Behind the Drive.
If you are interested, or know someone who may be interested, I also offer leadership and emotional intelligence coaching and workshops. You can find more information on my website, or you can use this link to set up a free 30-minute introduction to coaching session.
For more information on the next “EQ and WooWoo” workshop (Thursday, September 22nd) with my colleague and Spiritual Coach, Katie Kay, please email me or RSVP. This workshop series is designed to help you manifest action towards the year you want to live, the person you want to be, and the goals you want to achieve. We will be hosting quarterly sessions that intertwine the use of Tarot (and other Woowoo tools) and Emotional Intelligence to help you and your clients step outside the box in order to take your coaching and personal work deeper. September will focus on Relationship Management, harvesting what you’ve planted, and continuing to care for the relationships you are building and maintaining.
If you are interested in joining and co-creating these learning communities, please use the links above to find out more about ICFLA’s Emotional Intelligence Special Interest Group and the EQ & WooWoo Workshops. I hope you will come along for the journey!
I’m always looking for new inspiration, new books to read, and new podcasts to listen to, so please send your suggestions my way or comment on this post to offer some new recommendations!
As always, thank you for your continued support and readership! Stay strong, stay brave, stay true to you!
Wishing you a season of stunning sunsets, moments that take your breath away, and recognition of the beauty in the bittersweet!
Courage or confidence, which comes first? Which do you feel you lack or need to move forward with pursuing your goals, your dreams? What is standing in your way?
Desiree Briel Rodi Consulting & Coaching 